You Are My Celebrity

“Jokes”, “Compliments”, and other miscellany women deal with every day | 5 (+2) Things I Emailed This Week

Dammit sometimes it sucks being a woman. No, it sucks being discounted automatically based on something innate, in this case gender, no matter who you are.

I started this post a few months ago with the headline and a vague concept to rant about things that people tell me to chill out about because it’s “just a joke” or “you should take it as a compliment” when in fact it’s not and I shouldn’t; but current events have overtaken my original intent because dammit it is SERIOUSLY a terrible time for equality.

Is this “satire”? Fortune: Group of White Men in Patagonia Vests Confused for VC Fundraise 500 Million … of course it’s satire, right? (Also Silicon Valley already made this joke so it’s not even funny) I had to click the link below to make sure. Because despite the ridiculousness of the fake quotes, real quotes can be just as ridiculous.

Don’t get me started on Cam Newton—actually, it’s too late. Really with this headline? Forbes, a “real” source, reports “Cam Newton Puts 10 Million at Risk with Sexist Remarks to Reporter” Because he doesn’t put equality at risk with sexist remarks, he puts money at risk because women are so damn sensitive and might jeopardize his endorsements because they have all the purchasing power but are also not that important.

Speaking of endorsements …

Billabong doesn’t like lezzies:

Keala Kennelly’s Thank You Letter for the ‘F*ck You Billabong…’ Hysteria

Because endorsements are just for women with looks because women are only good for looks which is why they’re so damn tempting all the damn time: Austin Events Leader Reprimanded After Avoiding Female Workers.

In case you want to avoid his fate, A Hack for Men Who Don’t Want to be Accused of Sexual Harassment: The Rock Test.

AND THEN (and no and then!) there’s the Harvey Weinstein comeuppance, the absurd “woe is me I grew up in a different time where men were still raging assholes just no one called them on it” (personal interpretation) first sentence of his so-called apology, and the brilliant closing paragraph of this Buzzfeed article (of all places):

It is men’s privilege, in other words, not to have to know. For women, that knowledge, obtained via gossip or whisper networks, isn’t frivolous or titillating. It is a means of survival. Until men make it their duty to not just know, but to act upon that knowledge — publicly decrying and dismantling the hierarchies of power that shelter this sort of conduct — it will remain women’s burden to bear. 

And just to balance all this raging “feminism” which is better put as equalism, let me close this post out with the oh-so-manly sport of football that I’m not supposed to care about because I’M A GIRL: The NFL is being devoured by its own economic model.

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