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The Bird: The True Story of Why I Feel Guilty Buying and Wearing a Poncho With Sleeves

My mom owns a garment we call The Bird. It is a full-length poncho. Like a person blanket. With arm holes. Likely someone hand-knit the thing for her, twenty years ago before sleeping-bag-onesies were a real thing (and what a cool real thing they are). Admittedly, The Bird is warm on a cold winter’s night, but nothing about The Bird is fashionable.

Scarred by the appearance of The Bird in my early teens, you can imagine my surprise when perusing the racks of a clothing store, my eye caught upon a white-and-black buffalo plaid cape-like garment that zipped up the middle. I passed it up. Went back to it. Tried it on. Fell in love.

And immediately felt guilty. Twenty years after making fun of The Bird, was I about to pay actual dollars* for her chic(k) offspring?

I did, and I don’t regret it. I wore it immediately, without even washing (gross), and got instant compliments. My take is that the actual sleeves give the cape/poncho structure, whereas The Bird has none. You need structure in dressing, especially oversize. Should you want to try this sort of thing, check these warm-winter picks out:

*It should be noted here that whilst living in Aspen and becoming obsessed with Pendleton, I purchased from the Aspen Thrift (only the greatest shopping experience in the land) a vintage Pendleton coat which can only be described as a cape because it is oversized and has no closing mechanism in the front. But, Pendleton!

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