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[Avoiding] Unibutt, a full primer

Incredibly, improbably, ‘unibutt’ remains one of the top search terms driving traffic to this blog. In the month of October, 11 people got here with ‘unibutt’. 3 more came with ‘uni butt’.

An October 2014 post on what a unibutt actually is continues to drive traffic twelve years later. I am both proud and horrified.

And yet …

… if we’re still out there wondering what unibutt is, or more hopefully, how to get rid of unibutt …

… does the post need updating?

Enter: a new 2026 Primer to Avoiding Unibutt, by a new mom whose nursing, baby-on-the-hip-carrying, schlepping body is beginning to reveal why moms notriously have a mom butt that isn’t specifically a unibutt but definitely trends that way.

Still, as in the original post, the solve for unibutt is simple: butt cheek separation.

Now, we don’t have to go scrunch-butt shorts (those have enough controversy), but we do have to consider seams, pockets, and rise. Here’s a full set of diagrams my AI Claude built for you, because we are not about embarassing models or their butts in the year of 2026.

Put it all together:

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